Processing Mindfulness on a Sunday Morning

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I’ve  a grand memory for forgetting – Robert Louis Stevenson via BrainyQuote

 

Personal values of using the Laundry Room are similar to the use of the small office refrigerator, i.e. forgetfulness.     It happens on an early Sunday morning.  You fill two washing machines which are side by side, and each has a 27-minute timer.  You leave for a few minutes and return to see one machine has reached 16 minutes and the other is stuck at 25 minutes.  After a short phone call, you remove the wet clothes and fill another machine.

More than half of the 14 dryers are still full of dried clothes as well as the folding table.  If you are a people watcher, you might enjoy reading that a 20-30 something man enters the Laundry Room.  He bends down in front of a dryer and removes some of the dried clothes.  He leaves knowing he still has dried clothes in the dryer.   Forgetfulness happens at all ages [smile].

Have a mindful Sunday in you activities as you Choose Who You Want to be Known As.   “Jo Ann” M. Radja

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When Mindfulness leads to Emotional Intelligence. . .

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stick_figure_balance_mind_heart_md_wm Bing 052016At the heart of great leadership is a curious mind, heart, and spirit.   Chip Conley via Brainy quote.com

Over the past few days, I’ve read a number of blogs from Social Media Influencers and Government Leaders.  Stories emerged of how dysfunction not only causes breakdowns in communication but reason takes a backseat at a place of work.  We may become a bystander to a discussion that causes us to become very uncomfortable and we don’t wish to enter the “fray.”

Some four years ago I was attending a Networking Event and was participating in a conversation between two men who were consultants.  One man was from the East Coast and the other lived in a Chicago suburb.  Another man, unknown to us, walked up and asked if he could join our group.  We welcomed him (the black coat man) and he asked me about my business – that conversation led me to give him a sample coaching session.  The man was eager and surprised himself by telling me something he had not told his wife; he was uncomfortable with the disclosure and decided to walk away.  The two consultants offered that I shouldn’t have given my time to someone who clearly wasn’t appreciative of joining our discussion group.

What happened next was an example of personal mindfulness.  The black coat man walked around the room and said to more than a handful of people, “You see that woman in the red jacket [meaning me] she won’t talk to me.”   People began to ask, “Do you know that man?”   It was unclear to many why the black coat man continued his pointing at me and saying she won’t talk to me.

Mindfulness allow you to become aware of your surroundings, what you are thinking, what you are feeling and what these sensations mean to you at that moment.  Emotional Intelligence is a learned process where mindfulness forms the basis for you to manage yourself and by doing so, manage others.  As you manage your emotions you are able to assist someone else likewise.  Put another way, you observe what is happening around you, describe what it means to you, accept that someone else has something going on causing a disturbance, don’t take it personally and don’t become judgmental.  While it may seem like a balancing act between your mind and your heart, in fact, it is a process that allow you control over how you are in the moment.  The image above displays the end result of mind and heart balance – when you are comfortable in the emotional intelligence realm. 

Emotional intelligence is a process and it most definitely can be learned.  How you act in the moment is what I call, Choose Who You Want to be Known As.”   Since today is the last day of June we have another beginning in our imperfect world tomorrow on July 1st.  Have a great month of July in your chosen career path!

“Jo Ann” M. Radja, Executive and Career Management Coach

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Today’s Daily Prompt Post: Transformation

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We each have our own separate mantras to get through the day.  I have both visual items and words of wisdom on my refrigerator.  It really depends on what your activities are because we often don’t pay attention to how we are transformed every day of our lives.  It happens because of the beauty we see; it happens because of the irritations that cross our paths – like another mosquito bite that causes an allergic reaction on your skin that lasts more than one week.

What I visually see is an unusual cactus plant that grows minimally.  Sometimes little buds poke out from a leaf and don’t grow,  No transformation even in the sunshine of morning light.  It’s been three years of ownership and two transplants – so perhaps the transformation is years in the making.  It becomes an exercise of patience – the little buds just stay where they are – so you keep waiting for nature to take its course.

IMG-20160609-00831A mantra that has been on my refrigerator for a few years..  It has a different interpretation of  the word transformation.   It is a reminder to keep the values of who you are close to as YOU Choose Who You Want to be Known As.

Enjoy your day.   “Jo Ann” M. Radja

 

 

 

 

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What’s Your Popularity Choice?

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Earlier this afternoon, I published the following post on the social media LinkedIn;  https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/whats-your-choice-popularity-jo-ann-m-radja

Here is the text of that post:

What’s YOUR Choice for Popularity?

Associate Supreme Court Justice Stewart Potter is known for choosing to include an American colloquial phrase in one of his Opinions; namely, “I’ll know it when I see it.” Although Justice Potter used that phrase to define pornography, many of us also use our visual sense in deciding moral ethical issues. It’s generational, isn’t it?   We’ve moved from, ” A picture is worth a thousand words,” to “Selfie, anyone!”

Three Researchers, two from Oxford University, Jim A.C.Everett, Phd Candidate and Molly Crockett, Associate Professor of Experimental Psychology and David Pizarro, Associate Professor Department of Psychology from Cornell University, created an ethical scenario to understand whether a decision based on Popularity had any influence on its choice. The creativity of adding a choice of Popularity to well-established interpretations of ethics allows for inclusion of present-day understanding of morality. The scenario is:

“Imagine that an out of control trolley is speeding

towards a group of five people. You are standing

on a footbridge above, next to a large man. If

you push him off the bridge onto the track below,

his body, will stop the trolley before it hits the

five people. He will die, but the five others

will be saved. Should you push the man off the

bridge.”

The Researchers also added a twist to their “trolley problem” as they asked a question: how would you trust a social partner, based on their answer to the trolly scenario. Here is the May 5, 2016 URL for, “Want to be popular? You’d better follow some simple rules”:   http://blog.practicalethics.ox.ac.uk/2016/05/cross-post-want-to-be-popular-youd-better-follow-some-simple-moral-rules/

While many academics may challenge the findings of these Researchers, their result is applicable for business settings. It is:

thEthisandCompliancefromBING060816

 

So the next time you have to make a tough call, remember – people like people who follow moral rules.”

Have a great week as you Choose Who YOU Want to be Known As!

“Jo Ann ” M. Radja, Executive and Career Management Coach

 

LABEL, LABELED, LABELING

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It’s interesting how people want others to know who they are. We like to be known either by our strengths, by our family position or by what we do for a living. Yet, there are times when a situation arises where we may say,   “Please don’t label me as . . . . .”  We express those words because we want to choose how we are evaluated, and perhaps because the label we heard “rubbed us the wrong way.”

Our salary depends on our performance for a position that we chose to accept. So, our employer does label us for the position we hold and we agreed to that labelUnder what circumstances does labelling come into play in our careers?    While researching a few blog ideas, I came across a fresh presentation of how people can be defined in their roles at the office.   It is called Dr. Edward de Bono’s “SIX THINKING HATS” [registered mark].  The California State University at Los Angeles prepared a brief slide share presentation explaining each “Thinking Hat” …

http://web.calstatela.edu/faculty/jpark/Six%20thinking%20hats.ppt

Should you be a Red Hat and strive to become a Green Hat, how would you obtain the educational training to do so?  Online and brick and mortar classes are available as well as many Human Resource Departments.  Business and Civic organizations also offer programs for self-development.  As you Choose Who You Want to be Known As let your Label shine though as you manage your career.  Enjoy your day!

“Jo Ann” M. Radja, Executive and Career Management Coach

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Notes: http://www.debonothinkingsystems.com/tools/6hats.htm

 

 

Right now, at this moment, and no place else

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During your career, I’m sure you have realized it’s not easy to answer the question, “What do you want, right now, at this moment?”  Perhaps it’s because we don’t often get what we want or we don’t give ourselves permission to get what we want.  The reasons for this are so numerous; they would easily fill an unabridged dictionary.  So how would you answer the question, “Right now, at this moment, and no place else, what do you want?”

Perhaps there are actions available to you right now.  Are they reasonable, at this moment?  If the WANT is within your reach, what impact does not attaining your WANT have in your life right now?

A well-respected Neuroscientist, Dr. Jeffrey Schwartz, offers tips on “How to Reset Your Brain” as follows:

 

Change is Pain.     Behaviorism doesn’t work.

Humanism is over rated.  FOCUS is power.

Expectation shapes reality.

Start by leaving problems in the past.

Focus on identifying and creating new behaviors.

Self-insight creates change, not advices.

 

Dr. Schwartz explains that the reasons why goals weren’t met may be valid, i.e. the goals didn’t support or generate change.  So give yourself time to thinkWhen you do so, you generate new circuits of thought.  And with continued practice, new behaviors of change help you to achieve your WANTS.

Dr. Schwartz also tells us to remind ourselves to think regularly.  As you Choose Who You Want to be Known As this Summer weekend in July, consider whether this is an avenue that brings value to you.  Enjoy.

 

“Jo Ann” M. Radja, Career Management Coach and Change Agent

Notes:  AMEX OPEN FORUM, Strategy and Business Section, “The Neuroscience of Change, or How to Reset Your Brains.” Dr. Jeffrey Schwartz, University of California at Los Angeles School of Medicine. December 8, 2011.

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Belief, Believed, Believing…

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A thousand words will not leave so deep an impression as one deed.  Henrik Ibsen

 

Recently, I heard a statement made by former President Bill Clinton that made me stop what I was doing because I chose to believe what he said.  (http://www.nbcnews.com/meet-the-press/meet-press-transcript-june-29-2014-n143826).  I was reminded how often we believe what we hear because it may make sense to us, yet it doesn’t meet the reality of facts.  What leads us to believe something is true or not?   Belief, Believed, Believing  may come into play with our answer.

We say, I can’t believe it” — when we hear good news about someone we know and we say, “I can’t believe it” when we hear very sad news about a tragedy.  On the other hand, we choose to believe our impressions of someone we just met, because we have a belief our judgment is correct.  Our birth and business cultures strongly influence us as to our Beliefs, what we Believed and are Believing.  Our experiences and schooling surely play out in our Beliefs as well.  As we are approaching the remembrance of the founding of our country in a few days, why do we believe so strongly in America and its values?

What we regard as true is a belief.  Frequently in our careers, we may be asked to describe what we do for a living and how we would describe what we do in a few words. We want our answers believed.

As we Choose Who We Want to be Known As – We Believe in ourselves and what we do.  Have a great Holiday Week!

“Jo Ann” M. Radja, Career Management Coach and Change Agent

Notes: http://www.nbcnews.com/meet-the-press/meet-press-transcript-june-29-2014-n143826.

The description of the word “belief”, Roget’s 21st Century Thesaurus, Third Edition Copyright © 2013 by the Philip Lief Group.

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One Up, One Down and What’s You?

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Dancing is just part of the discovery, discovery, discovery. Martha Graham

 

During your career, have you danced in the dance of   “One Up, One Down and What’s You?”  It’s been happening frequently in the Midwest this Spring.  The dance begins when you meet someone and you start a conversation.  The What’s You dance occurs when the sincerity of both people leads the dance and each person dances away from an engaging business conversation.
The One Up dance starts shortly after the conversation begins and one person keeps circling around the other, demonstrating a perceived betterment, for whatever reason.  This dance usually ends as each party has opposite views and a sense of connectedness was lacking in the dance.
The One Down dance takes more time.  Patience, Humility, Curiosity or Discovery of self,  or the other,  is flowing through the conversational dance.  Both people feel they have left the dance with a takeaway to be used or considered in the future.
While I just described three dances, I know you can name many others.  What type of career dance have you participated in this Spring?  What did you discover about yourself and has it helped you in your career?  What should have happened that didn’t?  What first step are you able to take, to move closer to the conversation dance that you want? 
Summer officially begins during the latter part of this week.  I hope this Summer Season in your career brings you closer to the dance where YOU Choose Who You Want to be Known As.  Have a great week!
“Jo Ann” M. Radja, Career Management Coach & Change Agent
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A July for YOU!

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You can’t stop the future, You can’t stop the past, The only way to learn the secret, is to press play. Jay Asher This past weekend I witnessed a bag full of changes and is the reason I entitled this … Continue reading

Looking New. . .

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Great cultural changes begin in affectation and end in routine.  Jacques Barzun Yesterday I was presented with another opportunity to challenge an existing belief.  I’m sure it’s happened to you as some people describe it as a “make over”.  The … Continue reading